Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Isahanon nga Reprisentante sang M'lang sa Nat'l PRISAA- Pangasinan


Runner Ramil Calamba is the lone representative of Mlang town to 
the national Private Schools Athletic Association (PRISAA) in Pangasinan


ASCENDING ON THE STAIRS OF THE PROVINCIAL CAPITOLRunner Ramil Calamba
 (Extreme Left) lone representative ofMlang town to the national Private
 Schools Athletic Association (PRISAA) 
in Pangasinan

At the rubberized and world class track and field of Narciso Ramos
Sports Center in  Lingayen


TAGA-ATON INI NGA CONGRESSMAN. Mortz Celeste Ortigoza (L) poses with  his cousin
Pangasinan Congressman Boying Celeste. He is the Bangus Magnate of Pangasinan
who sells a significant truckloads of  milkfish in Manila in a regular basis.

Mas damo ang tawo sang Palarong Pambansa last year

The pathetically equipped  soccer team from M'lang in the 2012 Palarong Pambansa. 
Some of its players' game shoes were wrapped with packaging tape to stop them from disintegrating.

Ramil is a poorly equipped and poorly prepared runner from M'lang. He told me
the school and the town could not even provide him with running shoes
when he road ran from Mlang to Matalam thrice a week. Kulang na naman mga
 ginikanan ang supporta just like his counterparts in the Palarong Pambansa. 
Ramil dilemma is reminiscent of those blasted soccer shoes clad players
 from Mlang National High School  who were beaten to pulp by soccer warriors
from other provinces.


Ramil Calamba posed with Mortz at the Provincial Capitol of
 Pangasinan in Lingayen.


Friday, February 1, 2013

Tanga nga Pulitiko



TANGANG PULITIKO

Hearing kahapon ng provincial board about investors who want to plant Bamboo where local folks get jobs on the plywood, tiles, etc that would come from it.
Board Member to Investor: Ano ang Bamboo, tree ba?
I told two old media men: Anak ng baka, lesson noong Grade 2 natin iyan, ah. Kayong dalawa ito ang tanong ko: Ano ang Banana, plant or tree? Media Man-1 said: Plant !
Media Man- 2 disagreed angrily:" Hindi, it's Tree ! Pakingan mo iyong song na "Yellow Bird flying on Banana Tree!"
I asked the same question to another Board Member if Banana is a Plant or a Tree, he told me: Its a Fruit! Magulo na I told myself thus I pulled the passing Head of the DENR,an old man, and asked him the same question: He told me, banana is not a tree, plant, fruit, its a Palm!
"Dios ko, ano ang kasalanan ko sa inyo? Bakit niyo ako ginaganito?," I wept at a corner.

(Tagalog ta anay) Noong sinabi ng old man from DENR na Banana is a Palm, sabi ni Atong na media: Di ba iyong Palm, iyong Mariang Palad?". I cried again

***
PAGONG 

 Isang Pamilya ang magbabakasyon pero Lumubog Ang barKo na sinakyan nila.
 NANAY: kumapit kaung lahat sakin wag kaung bibitaw (Bumitaw ang anak nitong KUBA (BOGTOT in Ilonggo) sa kanya at nahiwalay ito.Pero sa kinasawiang palad Ito lng ang natira sa pamilya nya dahil kinain lahat sila ng pating)
 KUBA:Pating Kainin mo na rin ako wala nang kwenta itong buhay ko dahil kinain mo nang lahat ng kapamilya ko! Wla na riNg saysay ang buhay ko.
 PATING: WAG MO KONG LIN-LANGIN
KUBA:Bakit?
PATING: Pagong Ka !

 ***

PRIMA FACIE

 Here's my real experienced in a press conference sa Manila where the city treasurer, accountant, cashier were sued by the mayor of malversation of funds and anti-graft case because they pocketed millions of pesos.
 (Definition of terms so you can appreciate my anecdote:
PRIMA FACIE (spell "Patsi") :ay isang ekspresyong Latin na nangangahulugang "sa unang enkuwentro" o "sa unang pagtingin or at first blush"
MAYOR: Si Treasurer ay kinasuhan ko na dahil mi Prima Facie, si Accountant at si Cashier ay kinasuhan na rin dahil mi Prima Facie.
 RADIO ANNOUNCER FROM DAVAO (with husky voice): Anong klase kayong mayor! Kinasuhan niyo na nga iyong tatlo, pero bakit si Prima Facie hindi niyo kinasuhan? Sobrang lakas naman niya sa inyo.

 ***

Two New Words for Today: 

1.BAYOTIFUL - Having qualities of a woman who looks like gay, homos, faggot. They called it in Visayas and Mindanao as "bayot" or lalaki nga adunay kaibog nga hilawasnon sa isigkalalaki; bakla; babay. (Bayotiful is shared to me by FMLSM or Federasyon ng mga Mang-aagaw ng Lakas sa M'lang).

2. PUTAGENIC Pangit sa Picture sa Face Book, Pangit lalo sa Personal pag naka-Eyeball mo na.

Inas' Guy Interviews Enrile, Villar, and Legarda

Author interviews Senator Loren Legarda (R)

Author poses with Rep. Jack Enrile (L)

Author asks questions to Senatorial bet Cynthia Villar
AUTHOR IS FROM INAS, M'LANG

The past weeks senatorial candidates like Jack Enrile, Cynthia Villar, and Loren Legarda have barnstormed my gargantuan province before they do their hustings in the big provinces of Visayas and Mindanao. It was the politically correct thing to do. Pangasinan is part of the strategic Lingayen – Lucena Corridor where a big slice of votes for a senatorial victory would come from this area that composed my vote-rich province, Region 3, National Capital Region and Region 4A, that complement 38 percent to 40 percent of the national total number of votes.

 JACK ENRILE

 Before the January 17-19, 2013 poll by the Social Weather Station (with technically 1,200 respondents and three (3) percent margin of errors) appeared recently on broadsheet Business Week on January 28, 2013, I asked senatorial bet Enrile (Numbers 8-9 in the January SWS''s poll) what was his take about the brushes of his father Senate President Juan Ponce with fellow senators on issues like Sin Taxes and Reproductive Health Bills (Note: The January 17-19 survey was commissioned before the acrimonious ugly word war in the Senate between the elder Enrile and Senator Allan Peter Cayetano) and his numbers 2-6 and 4-7 performances on the July 27-30, 2012 and November 23-29,2012 respectively at Pulse Asia Surveys. “You can never pin point any measure or any reason as an uptake or downfall. Ganyan talaga boss ang politika. MInsan may awareness ang tao sa iyo, minsan walang awareness ang tao sa iyo”. “Dahil mas aggressive iyong iba sa kanilang TV advocacy, mas magaganda ang kanilang media plan, nakikilala sila ngayon so mas nagiging top of line iyong kanilang mga pangalan,” he stressed. He said he was not bothered about the declines of his rating. “I never expected to be this high anyway. Nag-uumpisa po tayo sa No. 8 noong December 2011 umakyat tayo after ng impeachment during (Chief Justice) Renato Corona sa No. 4. Obviously, may name recall pa noong panahon na iyon dahil tatay ko iyong presiding officer. Siguro akyat-baba iyan”.
He explained that his Numbers 4 to 7 popularity rating in December was a Goldilocks’ area.
 “Kasi sa nakikita po natin pag masyadong ka namang mataas binabatikos ka naman. Kung masyado ka namang mababa mukhang kinakabahan ka. kumportable tayo kung saan tayo boss, happy naman tayo”. 

CYNTHIA VILLAR

 A helicopter borne Villar ranked 8-9 in the latest SWS’s poll) told me recently in a one-on-one interview at the swanky Consuelo’s Restaurant in Lingayen that The Villar Foundation has started training residents of several towns in Pangasinan for their livelihood projects.
She said residents of Santa Barbara, Malasiqui, Calasiao, and San Fabian are being trained to make water lily stalks into basket and furniture. She gives sacks of organic fertilizer too to farmers in Pangasinan.
 “ Santa Barbara, Malasiqui, and Calasiao have common river with water lilies. We will train them to make water lilies into basket, furniture, to remove the water lily in the river because it could be the source of the flooding there,” Villar, who was the crowning guest in a coronation night of the fiesta queen in capital town Lingayen told me.

 LOREN LEGARDA

 When I asked Senator Legarda (No. 1 in the latest SWS’s survey) two weeks ago in the town of Mangaldan how can she solves the world class notorious prohibited price of electricity in the country. This was thus her answer:
 “Ah, focus on renewable energy, ang ating pagamit ng hydro (electric plant) dahil mayaman tayo sa tubig”. “But during summer and dry season hydro electric plants are inutile?” I posed to her.
“Well, solar (power) ay nandiyan.’ She answered.
When I asked her about her stance on possibility of nuclear power plants in the Philippines since it is a vogue among progressive and developed countries, she retorted: “I think I have to think of it”.
 “NEDA (National Economic Development Authority) proposes that coal as source of energy will buttress our deficiency in power," I quipped.
 “Coal nakakadumi ng hangin pero at the same time maraming coal dahil ito ay kailangan”.
She explained that she did not like coal as much as possible but it is inevitable based on the country’s need on the sources of power.

So dear readers those were your senatorial bets. I'll be writing more about their rivals here in my column.
(You can read my selected columns at http://mortzortigoza.blogspot.com and articles at Pangasinan News Aro. You can send comments too attotomortz@yahoo.com)